Comedy Acts of EO
by Sasha.Rizzoli
Summary: A ten word challenge done for fun. Hope you like it. A series of very short, fun one shots.
1. Random Elevator Items

**A/N: Dramawitsvu17 gave me ten random words and I had to use them in a short story and this is what I came up with. I hope you get a little laugh. I am planning on writing more so if you think of ten random words let me know them in a review and I will try using them. Please read and review.**

**Disclaimer: If I owned it Elliot and Olivia would be humping like bunnies but they aren't so I don't own it.**

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Detective Olivia Benson was sitting on her **couch**, eating a** cheeseburger** with her Beagle **dog** named Gunner, lying beside her when Elliot Stabler walked in to the apartment.

"Liv, look what I found in the **elevato**r," the handsome detective said with a laugh.

Olivia stopped eating and looked up at her fiance. "Yeah so what, El? It's a hair **brush**, a purple **wig** and a wooden **broom**. What do you want me to do about it?" She replied, trying not to laugh but it was unsuccessful.

Elliot put the items on the coffee table with a playful pout. "I'm getting a bowl of **cereal**."

Olivia laughed again and shook her head at her lover. "Cereal is for breakfast. Give me your **pen.**"

Elliot took his pen out of his shirt pocket and passed it to the beautiful brunette. "Why do you need my pen for?" He asked as he walked in to the kitchen.

Olivia lifted up her shoe and showed Ellot the bottom of it. "I gotta get the **rock** out from the bottom of my shoe." She poked her tongue out at him, playfully.

Elliot rushed over to her and kissed her on the lips before trying to take the pen back. "You'll break it."

Olivia laughed. "You can have it back if you make love to me."


	2. A Lil Crib Loving

**A/N: I know it's a little on the short side but I hope you like it. This one is for RavensIvy. Please read and review.**

**Disclaimer: If I own it, Elliot and Olivia would have lived out this fantasy already. Lol...but they haven't so I don't own it.**

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**A Lil Crib Loving**

The squad room was empty, not a **sound** could be heard. It was just after midnight so Detectives Benson and Stabler were alone and wanted to use this **opportunity** to live out a sexual fantasy of Olivia's, up in the cribs.

Olivia was lying on the cot furtherest to door. She was naked and waiting for her secret lover. Her partner.

The **crime** fighting duo were going to make wild, hot, passionate **love**.

The crib door swung open to reveal a naked Elliot with his member standing at full attention. He came strolling in with a bag of **grapes** and a bottle of **chocolate** sauce.

"Oh, El...My favourite chocolate sauce," Olivia whispered, seductively as Elliot apporached her with a bounce in his step.

"We're gonna have **fun**, my love," Elliot winked at his lover.

"I bet we are, sexy man," She laughed as she got up off the bed.

Olivia walked over to the wall, facing away from Elliot and put her hands on the wall to brace her weight as she leaned forward, making easy access for the handsome detective to get to her wet and ready core.

Elliot grabbed the bottle of chocolate sauce in one hand and grabbed one of Olivia's petite hips with the other before ramming in to her aroused heat. He then poured the chocolate sauce on her back.

"Oh El," She moaned in pleasure.

"Is my **queen** enjoying this?" Elliot asked as continued to ram in and out of her.

"Oh yes, El. Fuck me hard!" Olivia screamed as Elliot licked the chocolate sauce off her back.

The pair reached their orgasms at the same time, calling each other's names.

Elliot pulled his now flaccid penis out of his lover's core and stopped Olivia from moving. "Stay there," he growled, playfully as he kneeled down.

He licked up and down the brunette's slit up to her clit, causing Olivia to laugh and then moan.

Elliot loved her **laughter**. It was so happy and carefree.

The handsome detective grabbed a grape from the bag and made sure it got coated in Olivia's juices before eating it.

"Come on, El," she whined.

"Ok, baby," he whispered before returning to her core.

Olivia moved down, pushing herself down in to his mouth more.

"Use your** teeth**, El," Olivia moaned as she felt the familiar tingling in her lower abdomen. Her second orgasm was rising.

"Let go, baby," Elliot's breathing was heavy as his member was throbbing again.

Moments later, Olivia exploded in to her second orgasm for the night, making her knees go weak causing her to put more of her weight on to the wall.

Elliot turned his lover toward him and wrapped his big, strong, warm arms around her petite body before giving her a tender kiss on the lips. "You got anymore sexual fantasies, Liv?"


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: I was talking to a friend over instant messager the other night and I asked her to give me ten random words and this is what I came up with. I hope you like it. Please read and review.**

**Disclaimer: Own nothing to do with the show.**

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Detectives Benson and Stabler were sitting in their car, on stakeout, waiting and watching for their prep, Frank Dublin to emerge from the apartment block that they were parked in front of.

Elliot looked up from the **newspaper** and over at his unusually silent partner. Olivia was eating a **plum**, just looking out the window.

"Liv--" He started but was interrupted by the shrill ringing of his **cell phone**. "Stabler."

"El, he's coming out the **door**!" Benson alerted her partner.

"Oh shit! He has a metal **chair**!" Elliot stage whispered as they both jumped out of the car, dropping his cell phone in the driver's seat.

The crime fighting duo ran towards the house and grabbed the enraged man...he wasn't putting up a fight. It was like he wanted to be caught.

The detectives placed the man in the back of a squad car and the uniformed officers took the man back to the precinct with them. Benson and Stabler were now back in their car, headed back to the precinct. The car ride was silent until Olivia spoke up out of the blue.

"Ohh, I love this **song**," she smiled a full toothed grin.

"Yeah I don't mind it either. Want some **coffee**, Liv?" He asked as he pulled in to the car park of the nearest coffee shop.

"Ah sure that would be great, El. Remember I have one teaspoon of** sugar** in it now."

Elliot turned off the engine and unbuckled his seat belt. "Ok, Liv. I'll be right back," he replied before opening the door and getting out of the car.

As the brunette waited for her handsome partner she decided to get her **toothbrush** out of her bag, that she was using to spend the night at Elliot's apartment...she noticed something caught in her teeth and she realized that Elliot hadn't even told her about it. It only took a minute to fix up her teeth and then she put the toothbrush back and her partner still hadn't returned and she ended up drifting off to sleep.

Olivia woke to the smell of **fish** and opened her eyes to see Elliot sitting back in the driver's seat. He had two coffees and some hot fish and chips from the chip shop next door.

"Mmm...that's smells so nice...I'm starved!" Olivia smiled as she took her coffee and a chip.

"Anything for my tired, overworked, sexy partner," Elliot said with a wink.

Olivia blushed. Elliot was actually flirting with her...and he was still married, although seperated.


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: Here is another one I hope you like it...there is only nine words because that's call I was given...Lol. Please read and review.**

**Disclaimer: Own nothing except Ben.**

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Elliot and Olivia were sitting on a bench inside the zoo with their two year old son, Benjamin. The brown haired, blue eyed little boy was sitting in his blue and **white **stroller beside the bench, eating an **icecream.**

"Momma?" Ben looked up at his mother, with icecream on his little chubby face.

Olivia put down her **chicken **roll and looked down at her beautiful son. Her and Elliot's child. "Yes, baby?"

Ben looked forward and pointed. "**Monkey."**

"You wanna see the monkies?" Olivia asked to confirm.

Ben smiled and nodded.

"Ok, baby. In a minute..." She replied before looked up at her husband of three years. "El, could you please put down that pickle and pass me the baby wipes from the diaper bag."

"Sure, honey." Elliot put down the **pickle** and looked through the diaper bag. "There isn't any in here. Didn't you buy some when you went **shopping**?"

"Yes of course I did. Have another look, El."

Elliot nodded and took another look. "Bingo," he said as he grabbed out the newly found pack of baby wipes before passing them to his wife.

"Thanks El," she replied and then turned back to her son to wipe the icecream off his face.

"Mommy..." Ben whined and moved his face.

Olivia gently held the little boy's chin and continued to wipe Ben's face clen. "Ben, Mommy has to clean your face before you go see the monkies."

Once the young boy's face was clean, the family went to see the monkies.

"Up, Mommy," Ben said as he reached up to his mother.

Olivia leaned over, unbuckled Ben from the stroller and picked him up so he could see the monkies better.

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Two hours later, little Ben had fallen asleep in his stroller so Elliot and Olivia decided to head home to put their son to bed.

Elliot closed the master bedroom door behind him and got undressed, just leaving his boxer briefs, waiting for his wife to emerge from the bathroom.

When she did, he was pleasantly surprised to see her dressed in a satin **pink** lacy negligee.

"Wow, Livvie," Elliot moaned as Olivia strolled over to him.

Olivia kneeled down in front of him, slid a finger in to her husband's boxer briefs waistband and slid them down in one quick movement, freeing his erection.

She licked off Elliot's pre-cum before licking the underside of his shaft.

"Oh, Liv," he moaned and ran a hand through her long caramel tresses.

Olivia then her teeth gently along his throbbing erection and gently squeezed his **balls**. "Oh shit, Liv. I'm gonna burst already," he panted.

The brunette didn't verbally respond, she just continued her motions.

Once Elliot exploded in to his wife's mouth, Olivia swallowed, surprising her husband.

"You're joking, Liv. Is that even **legal**?"

She got up off the carpeted floor and just shrugged her shoulders, causing Elliot to laugh. "Come here, baby," he whispered as he gently pulled her down on top of him.

"We gotta be quick. Ben will probably wake up soon," she moaned as Elliot slid his hand under her negilee and slid two thick long fingers in to her aroused core.

Elliot plunged his fingers in and out five times, hard and fast till Olivia gently grabbed his wrist.

"I need you in me now."

"I am, baby," he laughed.

"You know what I mean, smart ass," she moaned and bucked her hips.

"Ok, baby," he whispered and pulled Olivia's negliee over her head before entering her in one quick, smooth movement, filling her completely.

"Ohhh, El," Olivia cried out in adult pleasure as her husband rammed in to her hard and fast.

Elliot could feel Olivia's inner walls clench around his throbbing member and he knew that she was close. "Let go, baby. Let go."

"Cum with me, El," Olivia panted and clenched her eyes closed to try hold off her orgasm just a bit longer.

Elliot caressed her cheek as he continued to plunge in and out, "open your eyes, babe. I wanna watch you cum," he panted back.

Moments later, the husband and wife orgasmed together, screaming each other's names.

Elliot slid out of his wife and laid behind her, spooning her before they were both interrupted by a tiny knock on the door, followed by a soft voice. "Mommy."

Olivia sighed as she got up off the bed. She put on her satin purple robe and looked at her husband. "Back in to Mommy mode," she said with a smile.

Just before Olivia opened the door Elliot whispered, "can I have my sex goddess back tonight?"

Olivia smiled and winked before opening the door and picking up their son.

Elliot smiled and put on his boxer briefs and sweat pants as he watched his wife carry their son in to the kitchen. "I'll take that as a yes."


End file.
